I drive my family crazy because of my environmental consciousness.
I think they would label me a borderline “eco terrorist.”
It’s so unfair. I am just attempting to be responsible.
I try to recycle everything. I race about the house, turning off lights the second anyone leaves the room (usually hearing behind me, “Dad, I was STILL USING THAT ROOM!”) I regularly holler out: “Did someone buy stock in the power company? Close the door/window!”
I drive not more than 60 mph on the freeway–unless I am in Kathi’s car; it goes fast and you don’t notice and I just can’t help myself. I drive slowly and carefully around town, while my passengers finally get out of the car and jog ahead so they can reach the destination sooner. They get aerobic exercise and I save gas. We all benefit!
On any given day you might find me rooting through wastebaskets or trash cans, up to my elbows in debris and gunk, culling through the garbage to locate discarded packaging, or organic materials for placement in a proper container.
Yeah, I know: ewww. Listen, what do you think soap is for?
But there are just some things even I cannot bring myself to do. Last week, (and as one of my heroes Dave Barrylikes to say, I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP) I read this article about using flannel cloth squares instead of toilet paper.
Read the article. They are not making it up, either.
Just think what would happen if our family took part in this:
I can see it now. A kind, innocent, unsuspecting visitor to my house needs to use the facilities. As he or she heads to the head, I call out with a smile “Oh, by the way, we aren’t using toilet paper any more. We recycle. Just use the small towel squares alongside the toilet and once you are done, drop them in the bucket on the other side.”
Yeah. What would follow is not appropriate for me to write about, since my year old grandson is in the room.
Speaking of my grandson James, what would happen to him if he grew up thinking this kind of lifestyle was normal? Thinking ahead a few years:
He is using a public bathroom, and does not know what to do when he is *ahem* finished. Grandpa, where is all the terrycloth? How do I tell him to use paper, which he has learned is for practicing his handwriting, doing math, and cutting out snowflakes?
Or, he is at a friend’s house. A friend he really likes. Unfortunately, he won’t be invited back to visit, and my kids will have lots of ‘splaining to do, when the friend’s parents discover what James did to their nice guest towels.
See what I mean?
So, I will continue to be a good citizen of the planet. I will do everything I can to produce a teeny-tiny carbon footprint.
Butt (sorry–but) if this no toilet paper deal becomes a movement, I am not giving in until the very end.